BANGKOK (Feb 6, 2007): A 76-year-old woman from southern Thailand has been reunited with her family after taking the wrong bus 25 years ago.
Jaeyaena Beuraheng, a Malay-speaking resident of Narathiwat province in Thailand's deep-South, after visiting her husband across the border in Malaysia 25 years ago got on a bus that took her to Bangkok instead of back home.
Jaeyaena, who can neither read nor speak Thai, boarded another wrong bus in Bangkok that took her to Chiang Mai, 1,340km north of Narathiwat, where she spent five years begging for a living.
Eventually, the unfortunate bus-traveller was arrested in 1987 and ended up in a social service centre in Phitsanulok where she remained until she was reunited with her family yesterday, The Nation newspaper reported today.
Three Malay-speaking trainees from Narathiwat who were working at the centre last month uncovered Jaeyaena's story and contacted her family members to come fetch her.
Staff at the centre said they thought the woman was a Mon or Shan, two ethnic minorities in northern Thailand.
Narathiwat is part of Thailand's so-called deep South, the only majority Muslim region in the predominantly Buddhist kingdom. Many southern residents, especially the elderly, can only speak Yawi, a Malay dialect.
Tuesday, February 6, 2007
100 things men should know about women
100. Girls enjoy always having something kind of wrong, like a headache or cramping or something. Remember: No matter how bad it sounds, she’s going to outlive you.
99. Most women will not have sex for the first time with a guy unless their legs are shaved. If your date shows up and you spot stubble, she’s trying to keep herself in line.
98. No matter how much she reassures you, if you can’t get a hard-on she assumes you’re not attracted to her.
97. Beware of your girlfriend's single party friend or gay bud. They want her to be single with them and will encourage any bad behavior as often as possible.
96. Jewelry. Now you always knkow what to get her for a last-minute gift.
95. The sight of you in your socks and underwear is the biggest turnoff in the world.
94. Never trust a girl who has no girlfriends. She doesn’t get along with other women because she’s either bat-@!$%# crazy or just plain mean.
93. Girls who say, “I love sports!” are lying. Girls who ask you what time the game is on, without specifying which game they’re talking about, are not.
92. A random hookup is more likely to result in pregnancy, because a woman has more sex when she’s most fertile.
91. She still has all the love letters and cards from her past boyfriends.
90. Just started dating? Women want you to drive, even if it’s their car.
89. A girl would prefer to get a $100 gift from Tiffany & Co. than a $500 gift from Fortunoff. Why? Because her friends will ask where she got it.
88. “If I give you my number on Friday, Tuesday and Wednesday are your best bets to score a date. Monday is too desperate, Thursday is too late.”—Claire, 27
87. Your female coworkers are obsessed with the fact that on average they receive less pay than male counterparts—and the fact that they work less overtime and get pregnant is irrelevant to the discussion.
86. Laying a towel down over the wet spot is like putting your jacket over a mud puddle for her, you noble bastard.
85. A recent study revealed that natural blondes could be extinct in 200 years, so unless she’s Norwegian, her towhead might be bottled.
84. Sixteen percent of American men have been with a prostitute—scientific proof most women are decent in bed.
83. Women always want to believe what you’re saying is true.
82. What do women really want in bed? More blankets. They get colder than men.
81. The threesome is not about you; it’s about the two girls. If you’re lucky enough to score one with your girlfriend, enjoy sex with the other one because there’s a good chance it’ll end the relationship.
80. If women have an excuse to take a pill, they’ll take it.
79. Never trust the woman who gives you the best blow job you’ve ever had.
78. “I hate when my boyfriend is sweaty and tries to lie down on top of me or cuddle after I’ve come. Wait five minutes.”—Erin, 21
77. The average woman kisses 79 men before getting married.
76. She hates your Xbox more than she lets on. Blow her off for some gaming and she’ll soon stop wasting time on a dork like you.
75. Women who are obsessed with their dogs also like to keep their men on a short leash.
74. “Girls who buy their men lap dances and pretend to enjoy it are kidding themselves. They’re trying to keep him happy with some controlled freedom.”—Suzy, 31
73. Over the course of her life, a woman will use 10 men for every one she loves. If you lent her your car or helped her move and didn't get laid, you're one of the 10.
72. During emergencies, women are likely to remain calmer than men. Though it should be noted that inventing minor crises on a weekly basis gives them more practice.
71. “Women grow hairs in a lot of the same places that men do—lower abdomen, nipples—we just get rid of them.”—Katie, 26
70. Unless they’re lesbians, she won’t approve of your hanging out with other girls. Even if they’re ugly. And, really, even if they’re lesbians.
69. If you have something to hide, she’ll find it.
68. Eighty-five: The number of males per 100 females in Gary, Indiana, lowest male-to-female ratio of any city with a population of 100,000-plus. The highest male-to-female ratio is in Salinas, California: 114 males for every 100 females.
67. Kiss her before two dates have gone by or you’ll be “friended.”
66. They can't live without tension. Every once in a while she's gonna pick a fight with you for no reason. Accept this as a running, inevitable theme and your relationship will make a lot more sense.
65. The most painless way to end an argument: Let her win.
64. An online dating service’s survey found that a woman’s ideal man has brown hair and blue eyes.
63. In the U.S., 21 percent of women ages 18 to 59 hold out for their honeymoon.
62. A British study claims a woman’s chances of getting married drop by 40 percent for every 16-point rise in her IQ. The same increase in IQ for a man boosted his chances of getting married by 35 percent.
61. When a woman tells you her problems, she does not want you to offer solutions.
60. Women often cite manhandling of breasts as the biggest foreplay faux pas.
59. “When I’m drunk, I can’t come. Not even with a vibrator.”—Lauren, 35
58. If they're going to do it, most wives cheat between the ages of 18 and 29.
57. Most women think they’re better drivers than they are. Don’t point this out while she’s at the wheel or she’ll freak and crash.
56. Women ingest about half the lipstick they apply, which means they eat approximately one to three sticks per year.
54. A woman might say she just wants sex, but sleep with her for a while and she’ll change her tune. “I’ve known so many women who think they can pull this off, but they always develop feelings for the guy,” says Evie, 22.
53. According to the American Association of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery, Angelina Jolie’s lips were the most requested celebrity feature among all female patients in 2004.
52. Despite always complimenting another woman’s short haircut, she secretly celebrates having one less competitor, since men prefer long hair.
51. Don’t call her “cute.” In her mind it’s the same as “not vomit-inducing.” “Sexy,” OK. “Hot,” yes. “@!$%#ing awesome,” only if she’s at least slightly buzzed.
50. Women often buy shoes a size or two small because they’re in denial about the size of their feet—which they can’t stand.
49. They dream of one day peeing in a urinal.
48. Women know where they stand looks-wise but worry about being considered cool, about which they’re unsure.
47. According to the U.S. Bureau of Statistics, 23 percent of 18- to 34-year-old women live with their parents, versus 31 percent of you losers.
46. Women want to talk dirty, but they’re afraid you won’t respect them in the morning. Reassure her that letting go in bed doesn’t make her less classy and she’ll probably go wild. Jäger helps.
45. Twenty-three percent of this magazine’s readers are women.
44. A psycho jealous girl will do anything to keep her man—including anal.
41. If she suddenly cuts her hair short, it might mean she no longer cares what you think of her. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t care about someone else’s opinion.
40. About half of all brides will lose a good friend over a ridiculous bridesmaid squabble.
39. It never hurts to say you're sorry, even if you don't mean it.
38. Let her beat you at something once in a while—poker, chess, Ping-Pong—and she’ll be more likely to give you what you want, like some peace and quiet.
37. Women’s public bathrooms are about three times more disgusting than men’s.
36. “At one point or another, I’ve gone through your things looking for any evidence from past relationships. I’m talking photographs, postcards, mementos, address books, diaries. If you don’t like it, get rid of this stuff before letting me in your apartment. It’s not about trust; it’s about curiosity, and it drives us crazy till it’s been satiated.”—Caroline, 28
35. Like you, girls hate nothing more than a clingy partner who needs them every eight seconds.
34. Chick rock strikes a deeply primal chord inside women while simultaneously revolting men. Just sit back and let her sing the Sarah McLachlan or Ani DiFranco song. It’s only about four minutes long.
33. The average woman owns eight bras and wears each one five times before washing. Shasta!
32. Girls will not sit on any toilet outside their own home or a five-star hotel. Everywhere else they’re hovering above the toilet in a squat.
31. Got a new girl coming over? Your (tidy) bathroom should include clean linen, a box of Puffs Plus, and several full rolls of TP.
30. “Don’t caress our faces while we’re kissing, unless you really, really, really like us.”—Rachel, 21
29. On a first date, women never order what they really want to eat.
28. Breast augmentation surgery has grown by 257 percent since 1997. The most popular size? C-cup. As if you didn’t know.
27. Gain her trust when you’re out by calling her at 10 P.M. She’ll go to bed content you’re thinking of her, even if you’re slurping Jell-O shots off some skank’s cleavage.
26. Put down the Drakkar and grab a box of Good & Plenty. Women are turned on by the scent of black licorice.
25. At least one of her friends wants to sleep with you.
24. A good but flawed man is a fixer-upper gem, and women love nothing more than home improvements.
23. Every woman is self-conscious about her ass. Tell her you love her ass and you’ll see it more often.
22. If you want more sex, tell your girl an attractive woman hit on you that day. Sixty percent of the time, it works every time.
21. More than half of surveyed females between 18 and 25 would prefer to be run over by a truck than be fat.
20. All women think they’re smarter than their partners in some significant way.
19. The more piercings she has, the more places she’ll let you put it.
18. Once in a while, let her pick the movie and don't complain about it.
17. Any good woman will tell ya, honesty is not always the best policy.
16. Chicks aren’t afraid to get kinky; you just have to have the nerve to ask.
15. Girls don’t want to date doormats. So make her proud and refuse to give up bowling night with the guys.
14. Don't take a woman to a concert you really want to see—she'll just want to leave early.
13. “Women appreciate a big penis, but having one doesn’t give you an excuse to suck at foreplay.”—Elena, 28
12. Studies show women are more attracted to “macho” guys near ovulation. The rest of the month, they’re drawn to “good providers,” otherwise known as chumps.
11. She likes one of your friends.
10. Ugly girls like to hang out with pretty girls because it makes them feel like they're more attractive. Pretty girls hang out with ugly girls for the same reason.
9. The minute she decides she’s even mildly interested in you, she starts making mental pictures of what your kids would look like and imagining her first name with your last.
8. Sixty percent of women in the United States color their hair, according to L’Oréal (who are obviously hoping they can peer-pressure the other 40 percent).
7. Dated a stripper? Keep your mouth shut, stupid.
6. Rub a sheet of medium-grade sandpaper across your face. That’s your five o’clock shadow when you kiss her. Now rub that sandpaper on your inner thigh. (Mind you, we’re not suggesting you shave.)
5. Female serial killers tend to use poison rather than guns or knives.
4. Foghat’s “Slow Ride” is not about a trip in the car. Get the hint?
3. The one breakup line she’ll never be able to argue you out of: “I’m sorry, but I no longer have feelings for you.”
2. Buying a present for your girl? She’ll hate it (and you) if she finds out you took along another woman to help pick it out.
1. You'll probably never know how many guys she's slept with. The standard lie is five. Which really means about 12.
99. Most women will not have sex for the first time with a guy unless their legs are shaved. If your date shows up and you spot stubble, she’s trying to keep herself in line.
98. No matter how much she reassures you, if you can’t get a hard-on she assumes you’re not attracted to her.
97. Beware of your girlfriend's single party friend or gay bud. They want her to be single with them and will encourage any bad behavior as often as possible.
96. Jewelry. Now you always knkow what to get her for a last-minute gift.
95. The sight of you in your socks and underwear is the biggest turnoff in the world.
94. Never trust a girl who has no girlfriends. She doesn’t get along with other women because she’s either bat-@!$%# crazy or just plain mean.
93. Girls who say, “I love sports!” are lying. Girls who ask you what time the game is on, without specifying which game they’re talking about, are not.
92. A random hookup is more likely to result in pregnancy, because a woman has more sex when she’s most fertile.
91. She still has all the love letters and cards from her past boyfriends.
90. Just started dating? Women want you to drive, even if it’s their car.
89. A girl would prefer to get a $100 gift from Tiffany & Co. than a $500 gift from Fortunoff. Why? Because her friends will ask where she got it.
88. “If I give you my number on Friday, Tuesday and Wednesday are your best bets to score a date. Monday is too desperate, Thursday is too late.”—Claire, 27
87. Your female coworkers are obsessed with the fact that on average they receive less pay than male counterparts—and the fact that they work less overtime and get pregnant is irrelevant to the discussion.
86. Laying a towel down over the wet spot is like putting your jacket over a mud puddle for her, you noble bastard.
85. A recent study revealed that natural blondes could be extinct in 200 years, so unless she’s Norwegian, her towhead might be bottled.
84. Sixteen percent of American men have been with a prostitute—scientific proof most women are decent in bed.
83. Women always want to believe what you’re saying is true.
82. What do women really want in bed? More blankets. They get colder than men.
81. The threesome is not about you; it’s about the two girls. If you’re lucky enough to score one with your girlfriend, enjoy sex with the other one because there’s a good chance it’ll end the relationship.
80. If women have an excuse to take a pill, they’ll take it.
79. Never trust the woman who gives you the best blow job you’ve ever had.
78. “I hate when my boyfriend is sweaty and tries to lie down on top of me or cuddle after I’ve come. Wait five minutes.”—Erin, 21
77. The average woman kisses 79 men before getting married.
76. She hates your Xbox more than she lets on. Blow her off for some gaming and she’ll soon stop wasting time on a dork like you.
75. Women who are obsessed with their dogs also like to keep their men on a short leash.
74. “Girls who buy their men lap dances and pretend to enjoy it are kidding themselves. They’re trying to keep him happy with some controlled freedom.”—Suzy, 31
73. Over the course of her life, a woman will use 10 men for every one she loves. If you lent her your car or helped her move and didn't get laid, you're one of the 10.
72. During emergencies, women are likely to remain calmer than men. Though it should be noted that inventing minor crises on a weekly basis gives them more practice.
71. “Women grow hairs in a lot of the same places that men do—lower abdomen, nipples—we just get rid of them.”—Katie, 26
70. Unless they’re lesbians, she won’t approve of your hanging out with other girls. Even if they’re ugly. And, really, even if they’re lesbians.
69. If you have something to hide, she’ll find it.
68. Eighty-five: The number of males per 100 females in Gary, Indiana, lowest male-to-female ratio of any city with a population of 100,000-plus. The highest male-to-female ratio is in Salinas, California: 114 males for every 100 females.
67. Kiss her before two dates have gone by or you’ll be “friended.”
66. They can't live without tension. Every once in a while she's gonna pick a fight with you for no reason. Accept this as a running, inevitable theme and your relationship will make a lot more sense.
65. The most painless way to end an argument: Let her win.
64. An online dating service’s survey found that a woman’s ideal man has brown hair and blue eyes.
63. In the U.S., 21 percent of women ages 18 to 59 hold out for their honeymoon.
62. A British study claims a woman’s chances of getting married drop by 40 percent for every 16-point rise in her IQ. The same increase in IQ for a man boosted his chances of getting married by 35 percent.
61. When a woman tells you her problems, she does not want you to offer solutions.
60. Women often cite manhandling of breasts as the biggest foreplay faux pas.
59. “When I’m drunk, I can’t come. Not even with a vibrator.”—Lauren, 35
58. If they're going to do it, most wives cheat between the ages of 18 and 29.
57. Most women think they’re better drivers than they are. Don’t point this out while she’s at the wheel or she’ll freak and crash.
56. Women ingest about half the lipstick they apply, which means they eat approximately one to three sticks per year.
54. A woman might say she just wants sex, but sleep with her for a while and she’ll change her tune. “I’ve known so many women who think they can pull this off, but they always develop feelings for the guy,” says Evie, 22.
53. According to the American Association of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery, Angelina Jolie’s lips were the most requested celebrity feature among all female patients in 2004.
52. Despite always complimenting another woman’s short haircut, she secretly celebrates having one less competitor, since men prefer long hair.
51. Don’t call her “cute.” In her mind it’s the same as “not vomit-inducing.” “Sexy,” OK. “Hot,” yes. “@!$%#ing awesome,” only if she’s at least slightly buzzed.
50. Women often buy shoes a size or two small because they’re in denial about the size of their feet—which they can’t stand.
49. They dream of one day peeing in a urinal.
48. Women know where they stand looks-wise but worry about being considered cool, about which they’re unsure.
47. According to the U.S. Bureau of Statistics, 23 percent of 18- to 34-year-old women live with their parents, versus 31 percent of you losers.
46. Women want to talk dirty, but they’re afraid you won’t respect them in the morning. Reassure her that letting go in bed doesn’t make her less classy and she’ll probably go wild. Jäger helps.
45. Twenty-three percent of this magazine’s readers are women.
44. A psycho jealous girl will do anything to keep her man—including anal.
41. If she suddenly cuts her hair short, it might mean she no longer cares what you think of her. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t care about someone else’s opinion.
40. About half of all brides will lose a good friend over a ridiculous bridesmaid squabble.
39. It never hurts to say you're sorry, even if you don't mean it.
38. Let her beat you at something once in a while—poker, chess, Ping-Pong—and she’ll be more likely to give you what you want, like some peace and quiet.
37. Women’s public bathrooms are about three times more disgusting than men’s.
36. “At one point or another, I’ve gone through your things looking for any evidence from past relationships. I’m talking photographs, postcards, mementos, address books, diaries. If you don’t like it, get rid of this stuff before letting me in your apartment. It’s not about trust; it’s about curiosity, and it drives us crazy till it’s been satiated.”—Caroline, 28
35. Like you, girls hate nothing more than a clingy partner who needs them every eight seconds.
34. Chick rock strikes a deeply primal chord inside women while simultaneously revolting men. Just sit back and let her sing the Sarah McLachlan or Ani DiFranco song. It’s only about four minutes long.
33. The average woman owns eight bras and wears each one five times before washing. Shasta!
32. Girls will not sit on any toilet outside their own home or a five-star hotel. Everywhere else they’re hovering above the toilet in a squat.
31. Got a new girl coming over? Your (tidy) bathroom should include clean linen, a box of Puffs Plus, and several full rolls of TP.
30. “Don’t caress our faces while we’re kissing, unless you really, really, really like us.”—Rachel, 21
29. On a first date, women never order what they really want to eat.
28. Breast augmentation surgery has grown by 257 percent since 1997. The most popular size? C-cup. As if you didn’t know.
27. Gain her trust when you’re out by calling her at 10 P.M. She’ll go to bed content you’re thinking of her, even if you’re slurping Jell-O shots off some skank’s cleavage.
26. Put down the Drakkar and grab a box of Good & Plenty. Women are turned on by the scent of black licorice.
25. At least one of her friends wants to sleep with you.
24. A good but flawed man is a fixer-upper gem, and women love nothing more than home improvements.
23. Every woman is self-conscious about her ass. Tell her you love her ass and you’ll see it more often.
22. If you want more sex, tell your girl an attractive woman hit on you that day. Sixty percent of the time, it works every time.
21. More than half of surveyed females between 18 and 25 would prefer to be run over by a truck than be fat.
20. All women think they’re smarter than their partners in some significant way.
19. The more piercings she has, the more places she’ll let you put it.
18. Once in a while, let her pick the movie and don't complain about it.
17. Any good woman will tell ya, honesty is not always the best policy.
16. Chicks aren’t afraid to get kinky; you just have to have the nerve to ask.
15. Girls don’t want to date doormats. So make her proud and refuse to give up bowling night with the guys.
14. Don't take a woman to a concert you really want to see—she'll just want to leave early.
13. “Women appreciate a big penis, but having one doesn’t give you an excuse to suck at foreplay.”—Elena, 28
12. Studies show women are more attracted to “macho” guys near ovulation. The rest of the month, they’re drawn to “good providers,” otherwise known as chumps.
11. She likes one of your friends.
10. Ugly girls like to hang out with pretty girls because it makes them feel like they're more attractive. Pretty girls hang out with ugly girls for the same reason.
9. The minute she decides she’s even mildly interested in you, she starts making mental pictures of what your kids would look like and imagining her first name with your last.
8. Sixty percent of women in the United States color their hair, according to L’Oréal (who are obviously hoping they can peer-pressure the other 40 percent).
7. Dated a stripper? Keep your mouth shut, stupid.
6. Rub a sheet of medium-grade sandpaper across your face. That’s your five o’clock shadow when you kiss her. Now rub that sandpaper on your inner thigh. (Mind you, we’re not suggesting you shave.)
5. Female serial killers tend to use poison rather than guns or knives.
4. Foghat’s “Slow Ride” is not about a trip in the car. Get the hint?
3. The one breakup line she’ll never be able to argue you out of: “I’m sorry, but I no longer have feelings for you.”
2. Buying a present for your girl? She’ll hate it (and you) if she finds out you took along another woman to help pick it out.
1. You'll probably never know how many guys she's slept with. The standard lie is five. Which really means about 12.
DaimlerChrysler to trim 10,000 jobs and three plants
DaimlerChrysler is planning to make as many as 10,000 workers redundant and close up to three North American factories in a round of job cuts dubbed the “Valentine’s Day Massacre” by union bosses.
The carmaker’s latest round of cuts, part of a wider strategic review called Project X by management, is to be announced on February 14, when workers might expect a more loving gesture than a redundancy notice. Investors are unlikely to be sending DaimlerChrsyler any love letters, either, as the plans will accompany the company’s fourth-quarter and full-year financial results for 2006, which are likely to disappoint.
The German-American carmaker surprised Wall Street in the third quarter with a $1.5 billion (£770 million) loss at its Chrysler division. Analysts expect the arm to show a loss of about $1 billion for the full year, with DaimlerChrysler as a whole remaining profitable.
Chrysler made $1.8 billion of profits in 2005, but last year’s massive increase in the price of petrol, especially in America, so slowed sales of its trademark trucks and SUVs that the company had a backlog of more than 100,000 unsold vehicles at one point last year.
The redundancies in America come after much wider job cuts and plant closures at Ford and General Motors, other members of America’s Big Three carmakers, all of which are suffering dwindling profits and slumping sales as more efficient Asian producers have taken the US market by storm.
The American companies are beset by ballooning employment costs, which include high union rates of hourly pay, big pension liabilities and massive healthcare contracts. The Chrysler Group has 62,300 US employees, about 26,000 of them in the Detroit area.
DaimlerChrysler in Germany declined to comment about the expected redundancies, calling reports that leaked out of a car show in Las Vegas over the weekend “rumour and speculation”. However, most analysts covering the North American car market believe that between 8,000 and 10,000 Chrysler jobs will be cut next week. Buyout packages offered to workers are expected to cost the company about $100,000 an employee, for a total cost of about $1 billion.
Project X is not the first big restructuring to have affected Chrysler. In 2001 the company announced plans to eliminate 26,000 jobs. Since then it has shed 40,000 jobs and closed 16 plants.
This round of cuts is relatively small compared with those of DaimlerChrysler’s Detroit-based rivals. In the past year about 38,000 Ford workers and 34,000 GM employees have been made redundant.
The carmaker’s latest round of cuts, part of a wider strategic review called Project X by management, is to be announced on February 14, when workers might expect a more loving gesture than a redundancy notice. Investors are unlikely to be sending DaimlerChrsyler any love letters, either, as the plans will accompany the company’s fourth-quarter and full-year financial results for 2006, which are likely to disappoint.
The German-American carmaker surprised Wall Street in the third quarter with a $1.5 billion (£770 million) loss at its Chrysler division. Analysts expect the arm to show a loss of about $1 billion for the full year, with DaimlerChrysler as a whole remaining profitable.
Chrysler made $1.8 billion of profits in 2005, but last year’s massive increase in the price of petrol, especially in America, so slowed sales of its trademark trucks and SUVs that the company had a backlog of more than 100,000 unsold vehicles at one point last year.
The redundancies in America come after much wider job cuts and plant closures at Ford and General Motors, other members of America’s Big Three carmakers, all of which are suffering dwindling profits and slumping sales as more efficient Asian producers have taken the US market by storm.
The American companies are beset by ballooning employment costs, which include high union rates of hourly pay, big pension liabilities and massive healthcare contracts. The Chrysler Group has 62,300 US employees, about 26,000 of them in the Detroit area.
DaimlerChrysler in Germany declined to comment about the expected redundancies, calling reports that leaked out of a car show in Las Vegas over the weekend “rumour and speculation”. However, most analysts covering the North American car market believe that between 8,000 and 10,000 Chrysler jobs will be cut next week. Buyout packages offered to workers are expected to cost the company about $100,000 an employee, for a total cost of about $1 billion.
Project X is not the first big restructuring to have affected Chrysler. In 2001 the company announced plans to eliminate 26,000 jobs. Since then it has shed 40,000 jobs and closed 16 plants.
This round of cuts is relatively small compared with those of DaimlerChrysler’s Detroit-based rivals. In the past year about 38,000 Ford workers and 34,000 GM employees have been made redundant.
Monday, February 5, 2007
Why getting married kills your social life?
Ever since I got married, my friends have treated me like I contracted a communicable disease. The dinner invites stopped, and the late-night phone calls, and then I started hearing of hot rooftop parties to which I hadn’t been invited. Of course, I changed a little, too. Without an incentive to man-hunt, I was less interested in going to parties and bars. Worse, I went from being an open book about my love life to one of those coy couple-people who always says, “Things are great.” It’s easy to spill about a lousy date when you know your friend will never meet the guy, but when you give a detailed account of a fight with your husband, she might tell you to leave him or say something inappropriate the next time the three of you are out to dinner.
As I became more circumspect, my friends found other friends who drank more, still smoked, and never looked at their watches. There were nights I declined an invite so Jake and I could stay home and watch a video (put marriage and Brooklynhood together, and it’s hard not to be a hermit). But there were nights I wanted to do anything but stay home, and everyone else was already out. Though I understood my sudden isolation, I felt wounded. I had become something I had vowed never to be: a married person without any friends.
I am not alone. Singles and parents have built-in communities, but the newly hitched exist in a social wasteland. Although there are bona fide smug marrieds who choose to check out of the social scene, many others do it only after being rejected by all their single friends. Janine, a 35-year-old married commercial producer, has felt the chill. “When your demographic changes,” she says, “your friends who aren’t in that demographic don’t necessarily adapt with you.” When she told her best friend, Daisy, she’d gotten engaged to her long-time boyfriend, “she looked at me and said, ‘What the fuck?’ She felt like I abandoned her. She wanted me to be that little old lady in Paris with her.”
These days they see each other less, and when they do, Daisy makes jabs. “I’m starting to get into cooking,” says Janine, “and when I tell her what I made, she’ll say, ‘Isn’t that cute, Betty Crocker, that you’re making dinner for your husband?’”
Sean, a 28-year-old grad student who moved to New York with his wife, Jennifer, last July, says they often stay in, even though they hate it. “There are a few times a month where we say, ‘We gotta get out of here.’ We wonder, Do we put an ad on Craigslist? Take up a sport together? We want to be included in other people’s lives because it enhances the value of our own.”
Though he admits they are often too tired to make plans—alone or with others—he’s also noticed that his colleagues seldom reach out to him. “Married people are thought of as not any fun, even if they are. I have good friends at NYU, and there are times they’ll talk about going out and not invite me. There is something stigmatized about a younger married couple.”
Those who find love later in life often get kudos from their friends who are relieved to see that they are happy, but young marrieds come off looking like Mormons, sexless drips who opted to end the partying for a settled life. “If you throw a birthday party, the married girls have to bring the husbands,” says Sarah, 26, an unmarried nonprofit programmer. “They only stay for dinner, because all the couples have curfews, and only the singles go to the bar. And no one smokes pot any more because, inevitably, they wind up with a partner who doesn’t.”
Jennifer, 30, has noticed her status has made her a pariah. “Your friends sort of step aside,” she says. “They’re waiting for you to reject them. Even my sisters were that way. I had to say to them, ‘I still have time for you guys and I also value alone time.’ You don’t have as much time when you’re married, but it’s not like you’re dead.”
Though singles are often very vocally unhappy when a friend decamps, Janine, the producer, says the most judgmental people are her unhappily married male friends. “They’ll say, ‘Gee, I sort of view you differently now. You were so young and available and hungry and you’d stay up all night working.’ I still do that! But they believe marriage is a trap, that you had your freedom and you gave it up. They put their feelings about their own wives onto you.”
Some young marrieds are so afraid to be stigmatized that they go overboard to denigrate their own marriage as a way of bonding with their still-single friends—something I have tried with varying degrees of success. “I’ll downplay my marriage when I talk to my negative friends,” says Janine. “I’ll say, ‘We’ve both been working so hard that we haven’t been out in a while,’ or ‘We’ve had in-laws visiting up the wazoo. You’re so lucky you don’t have to deal with all that.’” But the false modesty can be even more offensive than bragging. “They’ll hear me complaining and they’ll say, ‘Stop it. You’re making your relationship sound awful. Your life is great.’ And it is.”
As I became more circumspect, my friends found other friends who drank more, still smoked, and never looked at their watches. There were nights I declined an invite so Jake and I could stay home and watch a video (put marriage and Brooklynhood together, and it’s hard not to be a hermit). But there were nights I wanted to do anything but stay home, and everyone else was already out. Though I understood my sudden isolation, I felt wounded. I had become something I had vowed never to be: a married person without any friends.
I am not alone. Singles and parents have built-in communities, but the newly hitched exist in a social wasteland. Although there are bona fide smug marrieds who choose to check out of the social scene, many others do it only after being rejected by all their single friends. Janine, a 35-year-old married commercial producer, has felt the chill. “When your demographic changes,” she says, “your friends who aren’t in that demographic don’t necessarily adapt with you.” When she told her best friend, Daisy, she’d gotten engaged to her long-time boyfriend, “she looked at me and said, ‘What the fuck?’ She felt like I abandoned her. She wanted me to be that little old lady in Paris with her.”
These days they see each other less, and when they do, Daisy makes jabs. “I’m starting to get into cooking,” says Janine, “and when I tell her what I made, she’ll say, ‘Isn’t that cute, Betty Crocker, that you’re making dinner for your husband?’”
Sean, a 28-year-old grad student who moved to New York with his wife, Jennifer, last July, says they often stay in, even though they hate it. “There are a few times a month where we say, ‘We gotta get out of here.’ We wonder, Do we put an ad on Craigslist? Take up a sport together? We want to be included in other people’s lives because it enhances the value of our own.”
Though he admits they are often too tired to make plans—alone or with others—he’s also noticed that his colleagues seldom reach out to him. “Married people are thought of as not any fun, even if they are. I have good friends at NYU, and there are times they’ll talk about going out and not invite me. There is something stigmatized about a younger married couple.”
Those who find love later in life often get kudos from their friends who are relieved to see that they are happy, but young marrieds come off looking like Mormons, sexless drips who opted to end the partying for a settled life. “If you throw a birthday party, the married girls have to bring the husbands,” says Sarah, 26, an unmarried nonprofit programmer. “They only stay for dinner, because all the couples have curfews, and only the singles go to the bar. And no one smokes pot any more because, inevitably, they wind up with a partner who doesn’t.”
Jennifer, 30, has noticed her status has made her a pariah. “Your friends sort of step aside,” she says. “They’re waiting for you to reject them. Even my sisters were that way. I had to say to them, ‘I still have time for you guys and I also value alone time.’ You don’t have as much time when you’re married, but it’s not like you’re dead.”
Though singles are often very vocally unhappy when a friend decamps, Janine, the producer, says the most judgmental people are her unhappily married male friends. “They’ll say, ‘Gee, I sort of view you differently now. You were so young and available and hungry and you’d stay up all night working.’ I still do that! But they believe marriage is a trap, that you had your freedom and you gave it up. They put their feelings about their own wives onto you.”
Some young marrieds are so afraid to be stigmatized that they go overboard to denigrate their own marriage as a way of bonding with their still-single friends—something I have tried with varying degrees of success. “I’ll downplay my marriage when I talk to my negative friends,” says Janine. “I’ll say, ‘We’ve both been working so hard that we haven’t been out in a while,’ or ‘We’ve had in-laws visiting up the wazoo. You’re so lucky you don’t have to deal with all that.’” But the false modesty can be even more offensive than bragging. “They’ll hear me complaining and they’ll say, ‘Stop it. You’re making your relationship sound awful. Your life is great.’ And it is.”
US says North Korea must "get out of nuclear business"
North Korea must get out of the nuclear business, the chief U.S. negotiator said Monday, adding he believed the North "was prepared to negotiate" at the coming arms talks in Beijing.
He refused to comment on news reports that Pyongyang is prepared to freeze a key nuclear reactor and accept inspectors in exchange for 500,000 tons of heavy oil and other conditions.
"For us, the question is that we must implement the full September statement. The DPRK (North Korea) must get out of the nuclear business entirely," Christopher Hill told reporters in Tokyo, referring to a 2005 pledge in which the North agreed to give up its nuclear program in exchange for aid and security guarantees.
"For months and months, we have talked about a statement that exists only on paper. What we're looking for in Beijing is to see if we can move that statement onto the ground," he said. "The purpose of the exercise is to stop the North Koreans from operating this terrible nuclear reactor."
Hill added he believed Pyongyang "would come prepared to negotiate" after more than a year of stalled talks, but refused to elaborate.
Hill, who arrived here from Seoul, was to meet with Japanese officials before leaving on Wednesday. The next round of talks is to start in Beijing on Thursday among delegates of the two Koreas, China, Japan, the U.S. and Russia.
Also Monday, Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe said Tokyo would not consider giving North Korea energy aid unless the communist also came clean on its past abduction of Japanese nationals.
Pyongyang claims it has returned all surviving victims who were kidnapped to train its spies in Japanese language and culture. But Tokyo believes more Japanese are held by the communist regime.
"Japan will not be offering anything unless North Korea acts sincerely on the abduction problem," Abe told reporters late Monday.
Abe and Hill were responding to reports that Pyongyang has said it could freeze the reactor at its nuclear complex in Yongbyon and accept international Atomic Energy Agency inspections in exchange for light-water reactors and oil until the reactors are completed, reports AP.
Japan's Asahi newspaper reported Sunday that North Korea plans to demand more than 500,000 tons of crude oil a year in exchange for shutting down its Yongbyon nuclear reactor and allowing limited inspections. The report cited Joel Wit, a former U.S. State Department official who met chief North Korean arms negotiator Kim Kye Gwan and other senior officials in Pyongyang.
North Korea was promised two light-water reactors under a 1994 deal to freeze its nuclear program, along with an annual supply of 500,000 tons of heavy fuel oil until the reactors were built. The deal was scrapped in 2002 when the nuclear crisis re-emerged and North Korea expelled IAEA inspectors.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)